“So this is love. So this is what makes life divine. I’m all aglow. And now I know, the key to heaven is mine. My heart has wings, and I can fly. I’ll touch every star in the sky. So this is the miracle that I’ve been dreaming of. So this is love.” -Cinderella
When I was a little girl, I dreamed of being a princess and finding my true love. Disney movies fooled me into believing that you would have only one shot at this “love” thing. You see, every princess had only one prince. They never showed her going through reject after reject before finding her Prince Charming. What about Prince Douche Bag? Prince Cheater? Prince Liar? Prince Loser?
I learned the hard way that finding someone you really, truly love doesn’t come easy. The times I’ve ever told someone that I loved them had been premature. I guess either I thought that’s what love was suppose to feel like, or I felt that it was something I had to say because we had been together for a certain period of time. But what I’ve come to understand, looking back on my past relationships, is that I didn’t have enough experience to recognize true love.
Love. What the $%&* does that mean?! I know that I love my family. I know that I love my friends. And the love that I have for those people represents the place they hold in my life’s priorities. These people are the ones that will continue to grow with and make memories with. People who I can laugh with, cry with, and experience life with.
But what does it mean to love someone in a relationship?
The only thing I can tell you is what it is not. Love is not something you can buy. Just because someone buys you jewelry, expensive dinner and the latest technology fad, doesn’t mean they love you. Maybe some people feel that purchasing things at a high value shows that you are of value to them. But a ring can’t hug you after a bad day at work. A fifty dollar steak can’t be a shoulder to cry on. And an iPad can’t kiss you goodnight…at least the last time I checked, it couldn’t.
Secondly, love is not something you can be guilted into. When two people have been with each other for what they consider “a long time” there is this pressure that seems to come with that commitment of moving forward with the next step. I was watching American Pie the other day, and there was that scene with Vicky and Kevin. Vicky was in her room with long-time boyfriend, Kevin, and said that she wanted to take things to the next level. Kevin was more than excited about it because he though she meant having sex. Vicky then said, “I love you.” Unfortunately for Kevin, this was not what he, or his penis, had in mind. Kevin then explained how he wanted that moment of sharing “I love you” to be special. Cute. Cheesy. But really? I think he might have been saying that just to get her to sleep with him.
Which brings me to my next point: just because you are sleeping together, doesn’t mean that’s love.
There it is. So what the fairy tales fail to show little girls that dream of living the life of a princess are all of the struggles they have to go through to be with their true love. I think the only way to truly know if you are ready to tell someone you love them is to evaluate the times have said it. Maybe at the time you thought you were ready and that it was “right,” but looking back, can you say the same?
I have been in quite a few serious relationships, and I feel my experience in those relationships have given me the knowledge about love. I learned what love is not. And I also learned that I would not know what love is not, had I not had those bad experiences myself. Does that make sense?
I guess it’s true when they say you have to kiss a few frogs before you find your prince, and I feel my luck has just began to turn. I finally know what it is like to love someone and be loved in return. This mutual caring for one another has been making my life that much better. I’ve learned to love myself first and never settle for anything less, and now I have someone in my life that is adding to all of those good things I have established for myself.
Maybe that’s what love is…when it is full circle; not you loving someone and them loving you back, but you loving yourself first, and then having someone else love you too. I’ve never experienced that until this point in my life. That might be the reason why my love life is finally shaping into happiness, rather than frustration and confusion. There is no second guessing. It is all so effortless, yet I would do anything and everything to fight for it.
Being that my life is not a movie, my fairy tale is far from coming to an end. In fact, I think it’s only the beginning. But never the less, I will enjoy being a princess with my prince…even though he wants to be a King for a day ;)
Needless to say, Valentine’s Day 2011 was a great success! I feel bad though…I was teasing my boyfriend non-stop the days prior to VDay about him not having any plans for us. I did promise him that even if it was just an evening of us hanging out while he plays his guitar for me, as long as he gave me a heads up if I needed to take the day off work, I was good to go. But he, once again, out did himself and surprised me with what I will call the BEST Valentine’s Day I’ve ever had.
I came over to his house after a long day at work right at 5 p.m. as he requested (the 5 p.m. part is important because I’m usually always late, but I’ve been really good at being on time…and I can make the argument that me being on time was an added bonus to his VDay gift from me.) Anyways, when he opened his front door, my man stood before me with a fresh new haircut, wearing my favorite shirt on him, and smiling that smile that makes me weak in my knees. Waiting for me on his kitchen counter was a beautiful vase of a dozen red roses and an envelope with tickets to see one of our favorite bands…Yellowcard! My excitement for the flowers and tickets then led to a little makeout session in the kitchen, before it was rudely interrupted by my a call on my cell phone. (Note: always put your phone on silent before entering your boo’s place.)
All that kissing made us hungry, so my boyfriend then led me to his car for a surprise dinner. Even though we have been dating for awhile now, for some reason, I felt like I was going on a first date with him. I felt excited and had butterflies in my stomach the whole time. But that rush I had flowing all over my body was a good feeling. I love that even though we are comfortable with each other that we still get excited and even a little nervous when we do special things for each other. Despite the nerves, I was still hungry and ready to grub on some bomb food. We went to Tommy Bahama’s and had an amazing experience. The service was great, the food was fantastic, and all-in-all the atmosphere was romantic. We both enjoyed each others company and conversation over some delicious food.
We then headed back to his house, ate cupcakes, and cuddled up on the couch while watching the Grammy’s. That entire night was just perfect. But the best part, by far, was how we ended the night: me in his arms. That’s all I want and all I need to be happy. That warmth and security puts me at ease and I feel as if nothing can harm me when I’m wrapped up with him. And I know he would give me the world if he could, but all I could ever ask of him is his…well…love. He’s good at that. I could have used a performance by him with his acoustic, but I don’t want to sound too picky hahaha jk. But really, his a good guitar player.
So that was my BEST Valentine’s Day EVER! Don’t worry, I made sure to give him his VDay gift from me the next day, but this post isn’t about what I did for him. It’s about how special he made me feel and how he makes me feel everyday…which is nothing but pure happiness.
Now I got to go because he is sitting right next to me as I write this, and sorry people, but I got to make some more moments with him so I can share them with you.
Hugs and Kisses,
This not so single girl ;)
For my little sister…you’re one crazy obsessed beezo aren’t you?
Well, almost shirtless ^
Sorry for killing you..
Reblogging myself for your enjoyment and adding these..
(Source: goosetrick, via julianescott)
Twilight and Eclipse Pictures
I feel like I owe it all of my followers to do a post dedicated to the day of love…Valentine’s Day. Last year, my Valentine was my mom. It was my first Valentine’s Day as a single girl. At first I was devistated that I didn’t have anyone to share that Hallmark holiday with, so I had every intention of boozing it up with my other single friends while bagging on all of the guys who had done us wrong. But I realized quickly that I shouldn’t be bitter about being alone, but rather celebrate all of the love I have for myself.
Someone stupid once said that in a relationship, two halves make a whole. What a fool that person was. You cannot go into a relationship being half of the person you can be, expecting the other person to complete you. No one knows you better than yourself. And until you find yourself, may you truly find someone else who can love you for you.
Therefore my single friends, love yourself on Valentine’s Day! Buy yourself a new outfit that makes you feel sexy. Or treat yourself to a very expensive dinner. Take a bubble bath and relax. Maybe even play solo if you catch my drift, wink wink. You owe it you to yourself to treat yourself good, because if you don’t, how do you expect someone else to do that for you?
It took me awhile to come to that realization of loving myself before anyone else. But when I did, I found someone who truly brings out all of the great qualities I already have. And instead of completing me, he highlights the traits that make me love myself even more, and inspires me to continue to do things that will make me love me everyday.
I’ve been watching all of these cheesy commercials on TV about Valentine’s Day, and while all of them seem so cliche, I must admit there was one that caught my attention. The message was not to celebrate “I love you” but rather “I love us.” And it’s true. A relationship is not one way and while saying “I love you” might be a big deal in a relationship, the real test is if loving what you have together. Do you love your partner as an individual? Or do you love the two of you together? I’ve had someone tell me they love me, then they followed it with “but it’s not working out.” Until recently, I’ve never had someone tell me they love what the two of us have together, and I think it’s because I know who I am as a person, and I know I bring a lot of great things to the table.
In short, love yourself. Your happiness and individuality will bring along great things in your love life. And if you are with someone this Valentine’s Day, remember, it’s not all about you loving the other person, but you both loving what you share together.
Lots of love,
This not so single girl
P.S. I can give this advice because I’m not single anymore ;)
I cannot stress this enough: commonalities in music is so important in a relationship. Much like this fellow below, I too have dated musical douche bags. And I did give their tastes a try. But who am I kidding, it was horrible! Country music is HORRIBLE!!! Never will I sacrifice my ears to that kind of torture again.
The first conversation I ever had with my boyfriend was about music. At the time, we were just classmates. But we were up until 2 a.m. going on about music, bands, who we both like, who we need to listen to, and what not. It resulted in us having this musical romance where we would make each other mixes of music we wanted to share with each other. So not only did we expand our music “likes,” but we expanded our like for each other.
I prayed for the day I would meet someone I could lay in bed with, lay on the sand at the beach with, or take a long drive with and just listen to music. And my prayers have been answered. I feel having the same taste in music has given our relationship a special hobby. We both venture out looking for new bands with new sounds to share with each other. And I’m happy to say I even got to go to a few shows with my new boo.
But the best part about my new relationship is how my boyfriend is a bad-ass musician! Only one time, though, has he taken me to the beach late one night, busted out his acoustic and played some songs while I sang along. It was so much fun! It was sweet and romantic…my idea of a perfect date.
Certain songs have captured some of the most monumental moments in our relationship, from our first dance, to our first kiss…to many other firsts ;) But without that shared interest in music, I don’t think we would be as close as we are, especially because I think for the both of us, music is our passion. But now we have made that passion OUR passion, and it’s been amazing.
So, my advice to you if you are one with a passion for music, find someone you can share that with, because it does make all the difference.
It’s something that I’m highly interested in. I’ve found that most of my girlfriends have had quite different music taste to me and it’s grated on me somewhat. Sure we’ve had a few bands in common but most of my exs just HATED Muse or Ska music.
This is just wrong.
Plus they’ve liked really wank…
Damn! I always knew I had to be with someone who is a talented writer. And unlike the Kings…I freakin’ scored!!! Check out my man’s blog.
Following the NHL All-Star weekend festivities, the NHL resumed play on Tuesday night, as 24 teams saw action. The Los Angeles Kings took the ice in Minnesota against the Wild, as they started their critical 10-game road trip. With much anticipation to watch the Kings begin their march to a…
Having been a Kings fan for several years now, paying close attention to the teams this year and refusing dates from guys who try to take me to Ducks games (eww), I’m hoping I came in at the right time to see my boys in the playoffs. Go Kings!
As the NHL All-Star Break arrives, the Los Angeles Kings find themselves in a tough spot in the even tougher Western Conference. The Kings are in a tie for 11th place with the Minnesota Wild at 55 points, 1 point out of a coveted playoff spot. The San Jose Sharks and Colorado Avalanche hold the…
Today was such a beautiful day that I couldn’t pass up wearing a dress to school. I put on my knee-length black dress with my red sweater. But whenever I wear a dress, I think back to the days when my dad would make me wear jean shorts underneath my dress or skirt. His fear was that the little boys on the playground would take a peak up my dress and get a glimpse of my undies.
I was tempted to wear some little boyshorts underwear from Victoria Secret, the ones that my parents got me for Christmas. But I opted for the pink lace with white polka-dots, thong. I figured my dress was long enough and I was good to go.
I then left the house and headed for school. When I got out of class, I headed to the campus shuttle to take me up the big hill to my car. However, the shuttle was taking way too long, so I decided to walk to the parking lot.
As I started walking, I saw my professor leaving the building in which I was passing by. I sped up my pace so I didn’t have to face that awkward out-of-class conversation.
Continuing my strut up the hill, I felt happy knowing my day was going so well…until I noticed this weird feeling. I was walking in the sun, feeling the warmth all over my body, except for this cool feeling that occurred on my right butt-cheek. It felt like someone with ice-cold hands copped a feel of my ass. I quickly brushed my hand over the cold area when I discovered that my dress had caught onto my backpack revealing the right half of my ass to all of my university. WTF?!!!!
I was so embarrassed that my face had to be as red as my sweater at the point. I gripped onto the sides of my dress to hold it in place. I then casually looked behind me to see if anyone was there starring at my booty. Luckily, no was was withing 15 yards of me, but cars had been passing by, people were walking by in the opposite direction, and my professor was somewhere behind me as well!
I don’t know how long my behind was exposed, but I know it had to be long enough for someone to see. The funny thing is, is that I just kept saying to myself, “Thank God I still have a nice tan on my ass.”
Why do things like things like this happen to me? I have no idea. And while I use to use these silly experiences as the reasons as to why I was single, I’m happy to say that this is not the case anymore. I have a wonderful boyfriend who has come to like me for me, and laugh with me when things like this happen.
So what is going to happen to my blog? Well, I can assure you I will continue to update you the funny, yet very embarrassing moments of my life. Just know that while I was going through those alone, I now have someone to share my embarrassing moments with and who will laugh with me rather than at me.
One more thing…if anyone sees pictures or a youtube clip of a girl at school with her butt-cheek showing, please report it for me. Thanks!
This not-so-single girl ;)